Reverend Lowery, 36 Hours Later
Ever since I opened the Costco sized can of worms regarding Reverend Lowery’s benediction, I’ve had a lot of time to think about what I felt and more importantly, what I should do in the future.
But I wasn’t the only one thinking on things, it seems the Ta-Nehisi (a Chaotic Good if ever I have seen one) also spent the evening thinking about what I said. One of the reasons I like hanging at his blog is it like a conversation. So let’s talk a little bit more.
There is a strong temptation to simply say, “Tough. Get over it.” Or some such.
I get this completely. And part of the reason I get it is that I have told others to do just that, that it was only a joke, don’t take it so seriously. An earlier commenter took me to task for not being offended by “yellow” or “red”, but that misses the point. Up until that last line, the joke wasn’t on me. Now I was in with the unwashed masses and I have to tell you, I didn’t like it at all.
Part of the reason this hit me hard is because of who Rev. Lowery is. He is not one of my top-ten life heroes, but I damn sure know who he is and what he has done. And it would have so easy for him to say things differently. There have been many, many people on TNC’s blog who say that he should be given a complete pass because of who he is and what he has done. Nowhere have I suggested wholesale condemnation for the man, but I would say that who he is gives him the obligation to be more mindful of what others think of what he says, not less. Let everyone cast their minds back to Joe Biden’s description of Barack Obama as “clean” for just a minute and recall their own reactions. Anyone who said that Logorheaa Joe should have watched his phrasing has to step back and leave me alone.
Okay, for the rest of you still with me. Here’s the dead-on money quote from TNC:
Certainly, there is a sector of white folks who just want the niggers to get over it. But there is also a section of white folks who, themselves, want to be over it.
For the last ten years I’ve been trying to put things as succinctly as that. Damn you, Coates.
Yes, that is it exactly. I am tired of being, as TNC says, the stock villain. I want specific villains, like the moron who named his child Adolph Hitler, the jackasses behind the Ledbetter lawsuit defense, and assholes who drag people behind trucks. These people are no more representative of being White than bangers selling crack on the corner in Baltimore are of being Black.
I can’t find the exact comment on TNC’s blog, but someone asked why I was picking on Lowery and not Warren. This is something that hadn’t occurred to me until that point, but in retrospect is stunningly obvious: what Warren thinks doesn’t matter to me. Warren is on the wrong side of history and a religious bigot to boot. None of those things can be said of Lowery and so his opinion matters more to me. I absolutely believe that Reverend Lowery meant no harm and that he was only joking. I really do. But the joke fell flat for me.
Back what when I was in theatre, Davey Marlin-Jones was my directing mentor and one of the things he told me was that once you discover something true about yourself, you have a moral duty to change your behavior in response. So, as Craig Ferguson would say “What have you learned today, KevDog?”
I learned that while it is easy to tell someone to “get over it”, avoid the temptation. I don’t get to choose what other people are offended by and I can and will make a better attempt at understanding what hurt them.
8 Responses to “Reverend Lowery, 36 Hours Later”
Kev, I generally understand where you’re coming from on this but I just can’t get with it. I really think that you & anyone else who was offended is being very thin skinned about it. It was a joke, the man was smiling all the way so I have barely any sympathy for you in this instance.
For all the amusement and cacophony of voices over at TNC’s blog, I appreciate your candor and your openness. My fiance and I both gave each other the People’s Eyebrow at Lowery’s statement, partially because the yellow/mellow didn’t make sense, and also because the white/right rhyme didn’t follow the happy-happy-joy-joy ending the others did. That said, I know the original rhyme well and can spot a joking inversion when I hear one.
I am glad to finally hear someone step back from “get over it,” be they black, white, Dem, Republican, whatever. It’s the quickest way to piss somebody off and it doesn’t advance any sort of dialogue. So thank you for saying that. It reminds me that, as much as I want to tell my upside-down American flag-flying friends to stop being “sore losers” and to “get over” Barack Obama’s presidency, I only have to remember how Democrats felt four years ago. Over it, indeed. Thanks!
KevDog,
Good on you.
Speaking on stock villains, though, you also have to look at the flipside, you’re always the stock hero. The stock love interest. And generally, the stock leader of the free world.
@d.tafakari
Thanks for the understanding. Part of why this caught me is exactly because I don’t know the original well and so the joke was lost on me.
@Micah616
I do look at the flip side, and often. If you have the time, take a look at my earlier post on moral duty and see where I am coming from. I get unearned privilege and stereotyping both for good and ill. That said, you do make a good point.
@KnockoutEd
Your comment was originally marked as spam, so apologies for getting it up here late.
It’s your call on the lack of sympathy, I won’t rap you there. But that reduces your ability to complain about the jokes others make that you don’t like. Maybe then you’ll be the thin-skinned one, whether someone was smiling or not. Next time someone says to you, “It was a joke”, I’d like you to think about this conversation and get back with me.
And come to think of it, do you really think that smiling while making a joke makes it better? Think of all the times you have been slighted by someone and whether they were smiling or not.
I stand by my original comments. But I do appreciate how you nuanced your viewpoints here and admit I could have worded my thoughts better. Be easy.
One last thought…my boss is a really sarcastic female. Because I am a mildly sarcastic female myself, when she makes jokes, I don’t laugh. Beneath every “harmless” joke is a shard of truth. Just because someone is “joking,” to me, doesn’t mean that they don’t mean it, or that there isn’t steel in the corners of that smile. And I’m not one to laugh at a joke when it’s a jab. That’s just naivete.
That poem was “meant” to put white people down. There is no other way to look at it. I know that people secretly said to themselves “so there white people” because they knew that it put us down. I truly expect people to be kinder than that, especially when it is representing the government. Shame on them. I have never owned a slave, or sat in the front of the bus with black people in the back. Get over it. Name calling isn’t nice. It seems that others keep the racial thing going even where it doesn’t exist.
Respectfully.
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